Usually I am such a confident mother, I trust my gut and go with whatever my mothers intuition tells me but lately, I have been busy, with the mixture of the Christmas period, new year prep dealing with a clingy Robin and blogging things have taken a back seat, mainly that tiny little voice inside my head that tells me to do things when they are needed..
On the 15th December, around 1pm.. I realized that I had forgotten the children’s Christmas jumpers for the Save the Children Christmas jumper day
I cried… my heart raced and I felt so guilty..
How could I have forgotten? I had them all ready, but the morning rush must have made them slip my mind and they never wore them to school.. all I could think was the fear I felt whenever I was at school and I forgot it was a non uniform day, everyone else in their day clothes and stupid me sitting there feeling bad about being in my uniform.
I talked to some ladies who I know about it and they did reassure me a little bit, but I couldn’t help but feel so bad for them, when I did go collect them from school I thought perhaps I wasn’t the only one who forgotten, but nope, out of all the other children in the school my two walked out without a festive jumper on and I felt worse..
I hugged them and said sorry so many times but they told me they didn’t care, they had their Christmas dinner and got to make their own hats and had fun..
But I still feel bad.. Mum guilt is a horrible feeling, coupled with anxiety can make it feel ten times worse than it is, so I am going to make sure that going forth to not forget things, make sure I write everything down on the calendar in the kitchen and check it daily..
No more mum guilt for me thanks, and for certain no more forgetting things and then getting anxious over it all.
Have you ever experienced mum guilt? or guilt over something so stupid and pointless?
Until next time..