Sitting down at my new desk, I decided after the longest time that I am going to jump back in the world of blogging.
I honestly do not know how to start back up again, but I know that the best thing to do is open a new post and say hello once more. These past five weeks have been an interesting one, I have gone through the crap that is a breakdown of my marriage, a lot of accusations and deciding in the new years that I didn’t want to cry over him anymore.
I started learning to drive, something I had always feared but on the 2nd of January I called up the AA and booked my first driving lesson since I was 17 and I love it. I have had a good few lessons already and its so much fun to drive about. i feel so proud of myself for doing it. i am indeed a driving god!
My weight loss has gone into over drive, shortly before my husband left i was around 16/17 stone which is damn shameful to admit, but thanks to the stress of the separation and pending divorce I am now down to 14 stone 10 and I feel great, I now fit jeans that I decided to keep ‘just in case’ and I am really liking what I see in the mirror and have splurged on some beautiful Joe Browns dresses which I discovered thanks to ebay. its nice to finally feel some what pretty again after months if not years stuck at a weight I hated.
Now moving into a brand new month of new and exciting things I feel like I am ready to break down the barriers I have put up to protect myself emotionally, However I am still like an open book which has caused more problems than it should, I enjoy sharing my life online, on my Instagram and twitter but due to the fact that someone and I don’t know who is reporting back to my ex, I don’t know who to trust. As I said I like sharing my adventures and what I get up to with my children but if there is someone who feels the need to whisper into my ex’s ear everytime I spend time with someone else I worry greatly, surely that shouldn’t matter to anyone? and unfortunately my ex is now aware I am dating, something I wasn’t ready to talk about but now have too because hes aware of it. I don’t wish to share to much of it of course but my ex knows his name through reasons I don’t know.
But.. its been a good six weeks so far.. its nice to feel happy after spending so long unhappy and feeling incredibly unwanted.
March is here, spring is right around the corner and my son is turning 9 at the end of it, I wish sort of that none of what happened last year hadn’t but unfortunately here we are, March 2019.. single parent, dating and trying desperately to keep everyone happy.
I hope this year will be far brighter and end on a happier note. I have high hopes that’s for sure 🙂
All the best